Becoming a gentleman

The term “gentleman” is not used much anymore.  When is the last time you heard someone say about a guy, “He’s a real gentleman”?

Richard Reeves in the June 2025 issue of The Sun writes about Wabash College, a private liberal arts college in Crawfordsville, Indiana.  The college has an honor code that includes what is called “the gentleman’s rule.”  Every year the incoming freshmen males attend a a meeting with the seniors where the seniors discuss what it means to be a gentleman in modern society.  Reeves said it does help to produces thoughtful “gentlemen.”

According to J.F. Roxburgh, the headmaster of the Stowe School, a private English boarding school, we need men who are “acceptable at a dance and invaluable in a shipwreck.”  I don’t do well with that definition–I never learned to dance and I am not a very good swimmer.  I do, however, understand what he means.

Too many men don’t know how to act civilly .  They are “bros,” acting like tough guys, unable to carry on a civil conversation.  

The best example I can give you is to contrast Barack Obama with Donald Trump.  Obama is a complete gentleman, able to score on the basketball court and able to address and relate to a group of parishioners whose place of worship was attacked.  

Men need to aspire to be like Obama and turn away from Trump.  If you are using Trump as your role model, you, sir, are no gentleman.