Thoughts on Thanksgiving

I’ll be in Pittsburgh for the next few days looking at dinosaur skeletons and Andy Warhol art work, so I won’t be posting.  I will, however, leave you with a few observations on the Thanksgiving holiday.

Thanksgiving is an emotional time.  People travel thousands of miles to be with people they only see once a year.  And then discover once a year is way too often.  (Johnny Carson)

Cooking tip:  Wrap turkey leftovers in aluminum foil and throw them out. (Nicole Hollander)

Most turkeys taste better the day after Thanksgiving; my mother’s tasted better the day before.  (Rita Rudner)

A new survey found that 80 percent of men claim they help cook Thanksgiving dinner.  Which makes sense when you hear they consider saying ”That smells good” to be helping.  (Jimmy Fallon)

Thanksgiving:  when the Indians said “Well, this has been fun, but we know you have a long voyage back to England.”  (Jay Leno)

It wasn’t easy telling my family that I’m gay.  I made my carefully worded announcement at Thanksgiving.  It was very Norman Rockwell.  I said, “Mom, would you please pass the gravy to a homosexual?”  She passed it to my father.  A terrible scene followed.  (Bob Smith)